Let me tell you the destination in life, it’s a coffin, with no heart beating inside of you and a brain that is no longer alive.
One life to live isn’t just a show, it’s the script to your life.
That’s already written. Birth to death.
What happens in-between is your choice.
You can work a job you hate, have crappy relationships, feel unfulfilled, never discover your hidden potential, never follow your dreams, and never take risks. Basically, you can be normal.
Or you can be freed from the fear that pushes you to please others. You can choose to live by your own personal code instead of being enslaved by social norms and pressures and you can fulfill your deepest inner-needs while experiencing the pinnacle of psychological health and happiness. You can be more than you ever imagined.
Self-Actualization is possible.
Seriously. This is the guiding goal of my life.
To self-actualize is to discover and cultivate one’s own unique personal potential.
Physical, emotional, mental, spiritual. All the things that matter.
In all of those arena’s I am somewhere on the spectrum between reaching my full-potential, and failing myself.
Hey!, we’ve all failed ourselves at times. It’s okay, love yourself – dust yourself off, and write a new story. Failing yourself human. It’s alright.
But failing yourself is nonetheless a terrible pain and it’s also a shame because we can make our lives and the world a better place by discovering and pursuing our own potential as human beings.
Art, science, music, literature, love, romance, spirituality, equality – the whole of man’s accomplishments that have deepened and enriched the human experience have all arisen from the discovery and pursuit of the unique physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual potential that lies in all of us.
We all have the capability to enrich our own lives and the lives of others. And that’s what I want.
Self-actualizing is the desire to be more and more of what one is, rather than to be all that one can be – because it’s not about being your ideal-self, that is not self-actualizing.
Many people dedicate their lives to actualizing a concept of what they should be like, rather than actualizing themselves. This difference between self-actualization and self-image actualization is very important. Most people live only for their image.
– Bruce Lee
To self-actualize is to manifest your latent potential.
That is your potential that is not yet developed or actualized, and potential that often lies undiscovered.
But don’t think of it as fulfilling your potential – but rather as discovering, developing, and achieving it – because the purpose of self-actualization is not a destination, but rather the happiness that comes from the pursuit of it and all the things that accompany self-actualization.
Actualized people actually possess distinct characteristics that are pretty fucking cool.
In a nutshell, they live in the moment and find the beauty in each experience. They are realistic about the world and themselves and don’t see it through their baggage.They are not fearful of the unknown, or change itself. They are motivated by their own personal code and they apply themselves to solve other common problems in the world. They are introspective when faced with setbacks. They have ‘peak experiences’ in their daily lives that transform them and strengthen them. They don’t try to conform to other people’s ideas of happiness or contentment. They have a friendly sense of humor and can laugh at themselves. They are open, spontaneous and unconventional; being able to follow social norms, but not feeling confined by them. They are aware of their socially conditioned beliefs. They can authentically relate and connect to others. They are compassionate and accepting. They are selective in their relationships, but their relationships are meaningful. They are accepting of their mistakes and even open to making mistakes – but careful not to repeat them. They are aware of their imperfections. They are content. They value their privacy and solitude and use it to discover and cultivate their potential.
I told you they were pretty cool characteristics.
You can read more detail about the characteristics of self-actualized people here.
And remember, those weren’t the steps they took to become self-actualized, but rather the by-products of self-actualization. The characteristics embodied by those who committed their lives to the discovery and the pursuit of their potential.
The Steve Jobs of the world are self-actualized. The Blake Mycoskies (Toms shoes) of the world. The Will Smiths. The Bruce Lees. The Bill Gates. The Elon Musks. The Warren Buffets.
While those may seem like far-fetched examples of people who embody unobtainable lives, the fact is that self-actualization is possible for everyone – it has nothing to do with fame or wealth, but it can often produce it when people discover and cultivate their unique potential to it’s maximum.
But often people aren’t actively actualizing because they are focused on survival, or getting their basic emotional needs met. In order to self-actualize, your lower needs must first me met – as per Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.
I also posit that here are many people who have reached the self-actualized level of happiness but due to the private and selective nature of their friendships, remain unknown beyond their close friends and family.
A great example is Jason Everman, a guy who left the rock and roll world after playing with bands like Nirvana and Soundgarden, to join the US Special Forces and then studied philosophy at Columbia.
These are people who weren’t hindered by fear and didn’t let social norms dictate their lives, but rather, instead made the choice to live by their own personal code.
If you’re intrigued and want to know how to get started on your own personal journey of self-actualization, I suggest watching the excellent videos below for some great information on how to live a life that creates self-actualization.