Meditations: Sessions Seven through Nine: The Subjective Nature of Experience, The Will, and Perception

I’ve recently done some inner exploration with the help of organic plant based entheogens (Contact your local South American Shaman for details), and the experience has been nothing short of life altering – literally changing my MBTI Type from ENFP to ENTJ.

Basically, I got to experience reality without bias, without complexes, and without the filter of the Self. As Aubrey Marcus said of his Huachama experience, ‘It was a coming of age, twenty years late – but better now than never.’

The following notes, which continue my previously published meditations, are transcribed verbatim from my notebooks and have been loosely organized according to category.

The Subjective Nature of Consciousness / Reality

  • 7 bn Collective units of consciousness
  • Never before understood it
  • 7 bn individual units
  • The Cosmic Opera
  • Consciousness is not something to be fearful of
  • Consciousness is entirely subjective
  • Life (Reality) is made of consciousness and this life is entirely subjective
  • Ayn Rand’s philosophy is called Objectivism

Man’s Will

  • “It’s men’s wills that overpower one another”
  • Life is a contest of wills
  • Life is a game of potentials won by wills
  • Why are some wills stronger – more effective – than others?
  • Will = “The Force”
  • Human will is far more powerful than the universe (Or, rather, an equal power, since it is part of the universal force of cause and effect).
  • On a cosmic cause and effect level all beliefs are equal; whether you believe you can attain a small or a great thing, the effect is the same
  • Strength of will (Influences how great or small your beliefs are).
  • Think of the freedom of thought, exercise your will, your belief in yourself
  • The only limit is a man’s will
  • This is all how the powerful, celebs see life. A game of potentials and wills. Celebs merely have “talent” or appeal, or marketability – i.e., their potential
  • You can have whatever you are capable of having,
  • Lawrence. You will never lose a game of wills again in your life.
  • Lawrence: you have been manipulated by wills more powerful than yours so many times
  • I have played so small, been so stuck in my experience. Been so weak willed.
  • Look at the will and potential of others (Whom are massively successful); other people see their potential or what it might be and go after it
  • People live stuck at the bottom. Their wills broken
  • Drugs are used to manipulate the will and break the human spirit

Objectivity and The Power of Choice, Misc.

  • Getting into harmony with what you want is the magic of alchemy
  • What you choose to think you will feel
  • We can feel whatever we want
  • Rationality
  • To think less of thinking and more of doing
  • To not waste life in negativity
  • You can understand things without having to feel them
  • You don’t have to live life from your experiences, beliefs, background, etc.
  • You don’t have to attach your emotions to things – utility (Separating the utility of thought from the feeling of thought).
  • Prayer absolves a lot of people of their sins
  • Our battles are not with each other but with ourselves
  • What are we so afraid of that we are thinking all the time? (The Compulsion and addiction to thought).
  • If my G-d does not exist, he should
  • The hunger of desire is an illusion (Since we CAN create what we want).
  • Choose the thought that is most empowering, the absolute healthiest
  • Act as the man you are not the man you don’t want to be
  • Let love of life, the ultimate freedom, release you from fear
  • I am as my actions have made me, and my actions as my thoughts
  • “All is but thinking makes it so”. (Shakespeare).
  • Subjective
  • Potential
  • Belief
  • Will
  • Responsibility
  • “Reality”
  • “Perspective”
  • Self-knowledge
  • All psychological processes are identical but not all psyches
  • Women want a man w. Strong will, a strong frame – certainly stronger than their own
  • I never understood life until today
  • And most certainly never saw it as other people did.
  • So stuck in my experience
  • Everyone is stuck on their own experience.
  • Zero excuse not for me to fulfill my potential now
  • My whole life my concept of reality has been so sensitive
  • I have only been good when i have had a very grounded sense of reality,
    when someone i.e., a girlfriend had a stronger will that centered and anchored my reality.
  • I have always needed someone else to believe in me, never did before on my own. Was all a fucking mind game I was losing. Up until now life has been.
  • How plants? How San Pedro? (As an eye opener) helps separate consciousness from experience
  • You have the keys. You now know what the real limits and boundaries of reality are
  • Everything is just a concept people use to understand
  • Think about all the mindfucks, The Secret, P.U.A, all these cheap tricks, these shitty paradigms
  • Most people need a friendly packaging,, i.e., The Secret (They cannot wrap their head around the idea that so much of reality is built on BS small-minded concepts.
  • Previously I was so addicted to thinking and to feeling
  • I did not realize how stuck in that masochistic addiction I was

Confidence is Bullshit

  • “It’s your will against mine. You think you are cooler than me and I just don’t believe it. Because my beliefs tell me other people will think me cooler than you. Watch me.”
  • Think about the judgements people make based on the confidence or insecurity of others. And think about how much people care about what others think. In their value judgments, their choices.
  • People want to be cool.
  • All my failure (Do not belittle yourself for your ignorance), all of it. I was so stuck in my head.
  • Think how small even my wishes were (to be confident enough) lol
  • Confidence is what other people think
  • Confidence is bullshit. Confidence is the idea that I am only as cool as other believe I am.
  • (For many) Life is a game of who’s (fuckin’) coolest
  • Most people really care a lot about why other ppl think bc that’s where their self image comes from. And without that, life has no point to them

Manipulation

  • Understand peoples values and you can control the people. Think about how the people at the top think Lawrence
  • Understand people’s feat or being manipulated.
  • Lawrence, see, deduce how life works, what people value, how people think
  • Understand their fear of being manipulated by people who know this is how people work.
  • Like that movie where people are more afraid of offending a stranger than a serial killer
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3 thoughts on “Meditations: Sessions Seven through Nine: The Subjective Nature of Experience, The Will, and Perception

  1. Pingback: A Case of Narcissism: in Defense of a Reborn Ego | 7Saturdays

  2. Pingback: Journal: Let Them Be Salty | 7Saturdays

  3. Pingback: Finding Excalibur: My Journey to Knowing Confidence in Myself and My Path | 7Saturdays

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